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Letters To Husband To Save Marriage

Well marriage seems to be a crumbling institution.In the 1950s, 75 percent of the population was married. Today you have a majority ofpeople who are single which is astonishing when you think about it because it means thatin a free country people are choosing to be by themselves because they don’t find marriagecompelling. In places like Western Europe it’s far worse. Countries like Iceland havea 20 percent marriage population. France, Russia these are all seeing a decline inmarriage, a significant decline which is also leading to significant decline of the population.They’re experiencing negative population growth. If not for immigration these are countriesthat might soon disappear and they’re actually

worried about it. That’s why in places likeRussia you have National Love Day where you get a paid day to go home and make a baby.Because marriage is losing its passion. And in an adrenalin fueled 24 hour economyI think people are gonna make choices that give them excitement and give them adventure.And they don’t feel that marriage is giving that to them. Coupled with that is somethingthat we never expected and that is the sexual famine that is to be discovered in marriage.Some statistics have the monogamous marriage at about one in three here in America. Eventhose who disagree say that it’s about one in five. Now think about that. You could bea couple in your 20s, a married couple in

your 20s, 30s and every night you go to sleeptogether, sharing a bed, man and woman, no clothes on and absolutely nothing happens.That’s astonishing. And I think the ones who are really paying the price are the wives.I think in our culture we suppress and deny a woman’s true erotic nature. We seem to believethat men are the really sexual ones and women kind of put up with sex in order to get romanticlove. It’s summed up in one of those humorous quotations where marriage is the price thatmen pay for sex and sex is the price that women pay for marriage. There is no truth to this. There’s no truthto the stereotype of a husband saying to his

wife, how about some sex tonight honey. Andshe turns back and says, not tonight, I have a headache. And yet the husband can have anaxe lodged in his head and he’s still ready to go. Precisely the opposite is true. Womenare much more sexual than men. Men are uniorgasmic. Women are multiorgasmic. Women have a muchmore deeply erotic nature. Think about it. Women seem to have their emotions deeply connectedwith their sexuality which makes it like rocket fueled. And the suppression, the denial ofa woman’s erotic nature, of a woman’s sensual nature is something that is depressing theheck out of a lot of women which is why we’re suddenly discovering the emergence of thegenre of bestselling books like 50 Shades

of Grey. No one can explain why women in aliberated feminist age are reading a trilogy about a guy who takes a liberated collegestudent and gets her to agree to be a submissive to his dominance. In fact, Newsweek magazine did a cover storyabout this on why are women reading this. And the only solution they came up with whichjust shows you how shallow we are in our approach to the erotic mind, they said people are reading50 Shades of Grey because women are so overscheduled today with a job at work and then the domesticchores at home that they love the novel because they wanted to give up choice. They likedthe fact that Anastasia allows Christian Grey

to make all her decisions for her in orderto so that she’s less scheduled. So I said to myself, gosh, I’ll sell more books by writinga book about a woman who has a phenomenal housekeeper who does all her work for her.The reason why women are reading 50 Shades of Grey is that for many women, for many Americanwives that book is about the only time they’ve witnessed raw lust incarnate. They’re notseeing it in their marriages. Women today are loved but they’re not lusted after. They’reappreciated but they’re not desired. They’re complimented but their husbands aren’t rippingtheir clothes off. And we need to go back and understand why.How is it that three, four decades after the

Husbands Love Your Wives Ephesians 52533 John MacArthur

Well last week we started talking a littlebit about the family and I began by talking more directly to the single people and I havea few more words for you again tonight. I hope there have been some engagements duringthe week since I…I don’t know, but it would be nice if there had been some. Partof the problem in the world in which we live is you have too many choices. It was a lotbetter when you lived in a village and there were eight girls to choose from, and thatwas the way it was. You know, the illusion in our culture forthose people who are single is that somewhere there’s this perfect person hanging outthere and you just have to find that person.

Nothing could be further from the truth. Allyou really want is a godly partner, all you want is somebody who loves the Lord JesusChrist. And I’ll give you a little bit of a warning. You can find your ideal mate, youcan find the one that looks and talks and acts and behaves the way you think the perfect…theperfect spouse or perspective spouse should. They may look like you would want them tolook, and they may be interested in the things you would want them to be interested in. Theymay have a wonderful sense of humor and be intellectually interesting and all of thosekinds of things. And you can marry that person and that person may feel the same way aboutyou. And if you don’t walk in the Spirit,

that marriage will have massive problems. Or you can find someone who loves Christ andhas a heart to serve the Lord, and walk in the Holy Spirit, and if you’re in that samepath and that person is in that same path, you will grow into the kind of union thatwill fill your life with complete joy and blessing. So stop looking for the perfectperson somewhere. Stop scanning all of the unknown and available web sites. Stick withthe people that the Lord has brought into your life and the people that you know andthe people that are around you and the people that love the Lord and believe the thingsthat you believe and find someone who walks

in the Spirit and longs to serve the LordJesus Christ and watch the Lord make a wonderful and complete and lasting relationship thatwill be profoundly, profoundly blessed. Marriage doesn’t have to be conflict. Therewill be conflict in marriage because there’s conflict in life. But I do not agree withthe great General Montgomery who said, “Gentlemen, don’t even think of marriage until you’vemastered the art of war.â€� I wouldn’t agree with that. I think that’s…I think that’sextending this thing beyond a reasonable level. But I do understand that marriage does poseconflict because when you slam two centers together permanently, they’re going to rubeach other the wrong way because that’s

what sin does. But the answer to all of that,of course, is to be obedient to Christ, to love Christ, to love each other and to walkin the power of the Spirit and watch the Lord overcome those things and fill your life withprofound joy and blessing beyond anything that could be experienced in singleness unlessthat is what God has particularly designed you for. If you go back to the book of Genesis, forjust a moment, in your thinking, and maybe it would be good to do that for a minute.If you go back in to Genesis chapter 1 and we sort of start where you have to start withthis kind of discussion about marriage, we

are reminded in Genesis chapter 1 verses 27and 28, “That God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created them,male and female He created them. God blessed them and God said to them, ‘Be fruitfuland multiply.’â€� That’s the basic principle. Men and women come together and have children.They multiply, they fill the earth, they subdue the earth and they rule over the earth. This is expanded in chapter 2 down in verse18, “The Lord after making man says it’s not good for the man to be alone. I’ll makehim a helper suitable for him. Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast ofthe field, every bird of the sky, brought

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